Naseau -- Rough Draft

You say you wish you could hate me
Well so do I
But the thing you don't notice
The thing you never realized
Is the way that you made me
and your blue green eyes
The way that you held me up
and never, till now, lifted your disguise
It's the reason I breathe, now
The only way I could hold me head high

The way that you'd break me
and tell me the sweetest of lies
It's the reason those three words
make me nauseous now
It's the real reason I cry

But you speak to me now
with such bitter words
it's as if to say
I was the one that caused you hurt

You say that you'll never
love or open your heart again
If that's true, then what am I
but soured means to a bitter end

You say you needed someone
you just wanted a friend
but being friends was never good enough
you sucked me right in

Now what once was beautiful
is a rotten paper sack
Now what once was pure
is painted with ash, is black

My stomach, it churns now,
when a man sings to me
I can see no love, no longer longing
for much of anything.

You walk alone now, never by your side
you walk alone now, hang your head without pride
I'll sleep lonely now, I'll sleep alone
Knowing this house is no longer your home

But I'll break the windows down
I'll get cut by the glass
I'll bleed this life out
and make a new one last

You'll speak slower, now
as you cower in shame
You'll be alone forever, now
but one day, I'll forget your name.

Slipping (first draft)

Fuck the day's responsibilities. I just want to write. Here's the newest, freshest thing I have.


Spent a year in regression
I'm sick of this mutual obsession
locked in your bedroom,
I spent too many nights
fearing for your fragile life.

Kiss me, kiss me, tell me anything
kiss me, kill me, I'm waking from a dream
of what I thought
used to be.

You could say a million things
quell a million false dreams
but you say nothing
you never would say a thing.

I'm a checkerboard, I'm a puzzle piece
you're a lazy hand, a mind spent on dreams
but you never once tried to face
this inopportune reality.

I'm a string on the guitar
you never learned to play.
I'm the rope you could never jump
but instead just let swing and sway.

Replace me, but I'm not lost
Replace me, but it's a large cost

You stamped out the last sparks
left in me
half a decade spent in absence
but you said you'd be there, instead.

Tonight, I'd rather you be dead.
Tonight, I'd rather you be in someone else's head.
Tonight, I'm not the books I've read.
Tonight, I'm not sleeping, but slipping, instead.

Work in Progress #37

I've been obsessing over thesis and posting very little. I don't want to give away too many big chunks of my project before I'm finished. So, instead, here's a draft I started yesterday. Suggestions welcome.

There isn't enough coffee in the world for the mess you put me in.
Coffee, black, like you, black, like you.

Fifteen nights that still haven't seemed to pass.
Fifteen lives that I could not make last.

But you weren't one
you weren't one
you didn't know
a single one.

Just because you're crying
it doesn't mean your depressed
just because you're lonely
doesn't mean there's no one left.

But you're not Connor Oberst
and you're not a poet,
no,
you're no fucking poet.

So grow your hair longer
call me your father's name
grow your hair longer
and convince yourself of the pain.

I'm not a mirror, I'm no family jewel
but you're just the shadow
of one walking fool.

Don't curse the carpenter
when you gave her no nails
Don't curse the doctor
when you won't tell what ails.